Insecure is feelings of anxiety, inadequacy, and lack of confidence that make a person feel insecure. As a result, someone who is insecure may feel jealous, always ask other people’s opinions about him, or just try to show off his strengths.
Feelings of insecurity or insecurity are normal. However, in some people, this feeling of insecure is persistent. This condition can arise as a result of bad experiences, wrong perspectives, or perfectionism.
Insecure Symptoms and Signs
Several symptoms can indicate a person has feelings of insecurity, namely:
1. Trying to make other people feel insecure
People who have feelings of insecurity generally always try to make the other person feel insecure. Usually, this is done by sufferers by always showing their strengths to look great in front of others.
2. Showing off myself in disguise
An insecure person often shows off or brags, but in a humbled or complaining way. For example, they complain of being tired after traveling to different places or countries because of their work.
3. Share their achievements every time
An insecure person has feelings of inferiority or inferiority to others. This feeling of inferiority encourages them to always tell about the things they have accomplished.
For example, they can talk about their luxurious lifestyle or high levels of education. This is done to convince others that their life is perfect.
4. Blaming yourself when something doesn’t work out perfectly
An insecure person wants a high education, the best job, and everything is perfect. When they don’t get what they want, they will be disappointed and beat themselves.
5. Having little trust in others
Someone insecure tends to be more jealous in dealing with their partner, for example, they often peek at messages that come on their partner’s cellphone.
Because they have little trust in others, they will often confirm the truth of their information and are easily suspicious. This makes it difficult for them to have good relationships with other people.
Cause of Insecure
Insecure can arise as a result of a bad experience, a negative perspective on oneself, or the result of having a principle of wanting things to be perfect. The following is the explanation:
Experiencing failure or rejection
A study shows that the experience of being rejected or failing to achieve what one wants can make a person see himself and others from a negative perspective.
Get bad ratings from other people
Insecurity can arise because others have judged it less or less well when socializing. This is what causes insecure sufferers to tend to avoid social activities.
Wanting everything to be perfect (perfectionist)
In perfectionists, feelings of insecurity can arise when things don’t go their way. As a result, they will feel disappointed and continue to blame themselves.
Insecure Risk Factors
Feelings of insecurity are common to everyone. However, several factors can make a person more at risk of experiencing insecure, namely:
Suffering from mental disorders
Some types of mental disorders that sufferers tend to experience symptoms of insecure include:
- Eating disorders
- Anxiety disorders
- Narcissistic personality disorder
- Borderline personality disorder
- Paranoid personality disorder
Experiencing a traumatic event
Feelings of insecurity also tend to occur in someone who has experienced a traumatic event, such as:
- Failure to build relationships
- A loved one has died
- Getting fired from work
- Having an illness
- Pressure from parents
When to see a doctor
Get counseling with a psychologist or psychiatrist if the insecurity you are experiencing is persistent and feels very disturbing or is accompanied by symptoms of mental disorders.
They can help you understand where the feeling of insecurity is coming from and determine your condition and determine the appropriate treatment method to treat it.
How to Overcome Insecure
Allowing feelings of insecurity to drag on can cause harm to your physical and mental health. In addition, your relationships with those around you can also be disturbed. This of course will have an impact on daily activities and work.
To overcome the insecure and prevent it from continuing, do the following ways:
Eliminate negative thoughts
Focus on the positive things that have been done, such as helping neighbors carry things or helping friends with assignments. That way, you don’t think too much about your shortcomings or negative things.
Accept results that are not what you want
Try to accept things that are not your way, assuming they are normal in life. For example, if you have a situation that makes you embarrassed or insecure, try to see it as funny and laugh it off.
Turn failure into motivation
Stop hating and beating yourself up if you fail. Don’t see failure as a shame, but as an experience that can make you even better.
Spend time with the closest people
Spend most of your time with people who love you and stay away from people who make you feel insecure. This will make you more confident and see yourself in a positive light.
Build self-esteem and self-confidence
Start enjoying your current state and focus on the things you love. Build a feeling of pride in yourself and what you can do. Set targets to be achieved and prove that you can pass these challenges.
Please note, the feeling of insecure is not easy to get rid of. Therefore, you must be patient in carrying out the steps above. Don’t give up if you are still feeling insecure. By consistently doing the methods above, the feeling of insecure will gradually disappear.