How to respond to divorce threats. Problems in marriage are unavoidable. Often, some couples who feel unable to respond to divorce choose an instant way of taking divorce in court.
They thought maybe that was the only solution. In fact, an unhappy marriage does not have to end in divorce. When there is an intention to improve from both partners, the marriage can still be saved, especially if both still love and care for each other.
Therefore, before deciding to take your marriage to court, it’s better to look at it.
Some of the following ways how to respond to divorce threats
1. Recall happy moments at the beginning of marriage
This is the first step that is quite influential on the condition of the marriage. Remembering the sweet moments at the beginning of marriage can make you realize that your partner is still the same person as he was a few years ago.
In addition, old flashback memories can also remind you of the struggles of love for you and your partner. How and to what extent have you struggled. This of course can influence your and her decision to rethink divorce.
2. Listen to your partner’s heart
Communication skills are essential for how to respond to divorce threats. For that, the way to save a marriage on the verge of divorce is to organize communication.
Try to listen to all the expressions of your partner’s heart carefully. Let him be open with what he feels, and vice versa. This is an effective way to bring about growth and change because by listening to each other, you can see issues from different perspectives.
3. Don’t ignore every problem in your marriage
The key to solving a problem is to respond to it. Problems that are ignored, actually have a very big chance to create new problems in the future. For that reason, pretending that everything is okay to avoid a fight is not a solution. You have to be able to deal with all problems, even the ones that seem small and trivial.
4. Don’t compare your marriage with others
Every couple must have their own way of living their domestic life, as well as you and your partner. Comparing your marriage to someone else’s can actually be disastrous.
No matter how interesting other people’s marriage conditions are, you still have to respect your partner. When you and your partner can understand each other, then you can find a way to save a marriage on the verge of divorce. After all, the neighbor’s grass always looks greener, doesn’t it?
5. Avoid actions that make things worse
It’s perfectly normal to feel frustrated when faced with how to respond to divorce threats. However, don’t let this condition make you take various actions that make the situation worse.
Try to control yourself. Think more maturely in doing every action and see the problem from a clear perspective.
6. Rebuild the relationship
The next way to save a marriage on the verge of divorce is to rebuild the relationship. All the problems you face must make your relationship distant. Therefore, meeting and having positive interactions can be the solution. Arrange some quality time together so you can improve your relationship.
7. Make your partner a priority
This method includes more than just spending quality time together. Making your partner a priority is both physical and emotional. Sometimes the reason for quarrels or misunderstandings in marriage is not making the partner a priority.
Maybe your partner needs the same level and quality of attention that you gave when you were newly married. So, to save the marriage, you can let him know that he is still your priority and nothing will change the way you see or feel about him.
That’s how to save a marriage on the verge of divorce that you can do. Good luck
Partner threatens to leave when we argue
Differences of opinion are often experienced by couples in a relationship. Not infrequently differences of opinion lead to debate. However, the debate does not always harm a relationship.
A 2010 study from the University of Michigan, USA found that arguing is good for health. Avoiding conflict will only build up stress later on than arguing right away.
There is nothing wrong in arguing and trying to defend an opinion with all the arguments that support it. It’s just that, some points need to be considered partner threatens to leave when we argue
1. Arguments aim to form an understanding
Try to remember the moment of debate with your partner, there could be a ‘thirst’ for victory when arguing. In fact, arguing in a relationship aims for partners to understand each other what their partner thinks. The argument is expected to lead to a solution, not so that the partner loses the debate.
People who argue successfully focus on how to solve problems and fend off issues, not beat the other person. Arguments should never be character assassination or make people question their integrity.
2. Want to ask
When arguing, each has needs and goals to be achieved. Asking questions is the key to understanding the opponent’s point of view.
It is recommended to lower the tone of voice. Instead, treat your partner not as an enemy and as someone who wants to achieve a goal in the discussion.
If you understand their goals and can achieve them, an argument can be a solution.
3. Avoid the words ‘but’ and ‘however’
The use of the words ‘but’ and ‘however’ shows that people do not care about the other person’s position. At first, people praised but, the word ‘but’ made the conversation just fall apart.
“To be more successful, replace the word ‘but’ or ‘however’ with ‘and’. Why? ‘and’ sounds more positive. It creates new opportunities. It doesn’t take away what was said before,”.
4. Control speech tone and body language
Successful people argue pay attention to the tone of his voice. People understand that it is not only about what is said but also how to say it.
People also control their body language. They are in a high emotional state and everyone needs private space and respect.
5. Listening is not influencing
One of the keys to winning conflict is to ask why what, and how. This question word forces people to speak and demands the other person to listen so that the other person has the opportunity to understand the other person’s point of view.
Understanding the other person is the key to turning a debate into a discussion. In discussions, the goal is to resolve conflicts. In arguing the goal is to win, and often the result is both losers.
6. Want to apologize
In a debate, things usually arise outside of the conversation. People are increasingly indifferent to the feelings of others. They are also reluctant to apologize.
The person who wins the argument is the person who knows that I’m sorry if you feel that way’ can interpret as aloofness. They hold back if they say negative things or act stupid.